My Tribute

I received in the mail today from my sister a copy of the funeral program and tribute booklet for my brother-in-law, Gwin Turner. All of their children and grandchildren, as well as a daughter-in-law and a granddaughter-in-law, wrote tributes to their father/grandfather/father-in-law. What a wonderfully sweet gesture that was -- it brought tears to my eyes -- and I began to think about what I could say about him.

Gwin and Norma (my sister) got married when she was only 15 years old and had been married for 57 years. I don't know if Gwin ever dated anyone else or not (he was 20 when they married), but I know Norma had not. In fact, the two of them never dated. We all went to the same church, and he would come to our house on the pretense of visiting with my older brother who was his age. Then he and Norma would sit together on the couch in the living room watching their manners lest one of our parents should walk by. Anyway, I was only 9 years old at that time, so I never felt very "close" to Gwin. They always lived in another state while getting their education (seminary in New Orleans, LA and further seminary in Fort Worth, TX), and I didn't get to spend any time with them.

One incident that has stuck with me through the years is when I went to stay with them for a few days after their first two children were born. By then I was about 12 or 13 years old. When either of the children misbehaved or didn't mind as he thought they should, Gwin would spank. That was ok, but it was what he did next that made my blood boil. He wouldn't let them cry and made them stand in front of him and smile at him before they could walk away. I yelled at him and he then threatened me and said if I didn't hush I would be next. Would you believe that as much as I love him today and as well as his children have turned out, I still get mad when I think about that!!!???!?!!!!!!! Is that unforgiveness or what?! We've talked about that incident several times in the recent past, and they (he and his children) think it's funny. Needless to say, I didn't and still don't. Maybe one day I can turn that loose. ha.

Besides being one of the best preachers I ever heard, Gwin was one of the sweetest, kindest men I've ever known. One thing that no one else has mentioned is the fact that he loved my sister with all his heart. He was a wonderful provider (not only for her but for the whole family), gave her lavish gifts, and made it known that she was his inspiration and joy. I've visited with then on several occasions, and Gwin always went with us wherever we went (Disneyland, Universal, California Adventures, etc.), took a book/Bible with him, his cell phone, found him a spot to sit close to a concession stand and told us to go have a good time for as long as we wanted. How many men do you know that would do that? I truly wish I could have known him better, but distance prevented. He had a beautiful voice and could play the accordion, too. After reading his family's memories, I see there was a lot about him I didn't know or get to see. I do know his family loved him dearly, and he will be missed by everyone, including me.

My sister has a long hard road ahead of her adjusting to life within Gwin, but her faith is strong, she has family support, knows where he is, and will be fine. I wish I could have gone to be with her during this time, but that just wasn't possible. Maybe in a month or two we can visit. In the meantime, she's in my heart and prayers. I love you, sis!

Until next time...Wanda.